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| Welcome 2022 |
2021, 31st Dec 6:35 PM,
The last day of the year and I am unable to think of a beginning to describe this year. Covid can not be left in all this, a devastation of course, the scenes were horrific, people losing their loved ones and bans everywhere around the world on almost everything and to the new mask culture! It has all been so different, these events have affected the way we used to live. When the pandemic started I was in Jaipur, and was living alone in a Hostel, I managed to survive somehow, like everybody else, barely on Maggi, Cornflakes and dates, but I took care of my health a lot, worked out a lot, exercised a lot. Every organisation was rolling out free courses, everyone had time to learn new things, I did start Python but was not able to complete it. Then I changed my place and moved to a locality called Mansarovar, this place was beautiful!
I feel like, if you want to make a city your own, if you want to develop a friendship, go out in the night and explore the mornings and trust me, you will not even realise and the city would start feeling like your own, like you have known it for many different lifetimes. Jaipur became a close friend for me, its streets, its food, the culture and the way people talk. Everything felt like my own, like I am a part of it since the beginning. Well, eventually I had to leave, so I resigned in September and came back to my family who are now in Hyderabad. They had to struggle too, new place, new people, new jobs. Things were tough, in-fact they still are. I have joined a company here too, its just been a month now. We need furniture! I am planning to buy some.
This year has been a lesson, this year has been the peak of loneliness, this year has really been a constant struggle, this year, I confessed my mistakes, I told people I was wrong, some were closest once and is now distant only because I was foolish, childish and immature. I wrote a lot, figured out that I am kind of good writing Ghazals, I still write.
Please allow me now to flow into the sentimental part of me. I write and my emotions don't come in! Cant be!
Some days were like, I am on the verge of breaking, standing on the edge, looking down, feeling the bone-chilling wind, with tears in my eyes. This year, almost everyday I have felt like there are very few people with whom I can discuss my heart out and with some, even if I want to, I cant!
Where do you go when the chaos within you starts to break all the boundaries, starts to just crawl into your reality and torn things apart. I can not even remember how many instances I have had this year where I felt like this, but after all this, everytime I realized something, as he used to say, "this too will pass" and that one thing has been a backbone for me. 2021 brought some closer and some are left behind.
I would have never thought that I would start competitive programming and will make a small Youtube channel, upload solution videos on it, but I did and I can say that in the end things are better, things are on track, no matter what is going inside me, I have the momentum now. I really do not know how will things turn out. I am preparing to switch to IT, if things went well, into Webdev. But still I need a couple of months to prepare, then go for mock tests and start applying, also a good project!
Seems like the chaos within me will continue, on every phase, but I will not stop this time, till I am visible to that one person and I will make sure, wherever I am in the world, I am visible, or else there is no meaning of anything that I am doing.
So keep hustling, keep working, keep getting better, have faith and I wish you a very Happy New Year!
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